Following the Sun

(This is the final installment in my rhythm series. To see the first three posts please see here: daily, weekly, monthly )

As the sun starts to fall towards darkness again, I can't help but be excited.

I'm a darkness kind of girl.

I love the shorter days, cooler temperatures, and festivals of the season.

The darkness surrounds me like a security blanket. I. Love. This. Season.

That being said, as a family we aren't as in sync with the sun as we are with the moon.  To be honest, all that extra daylight that starts in the early months of the year really throws us for a loop. The days are almost too long, the nights too short.  And not one of us enjoys the heat.

I think the majority of our issue with all this darn daylight is that we are a family that thrives on routine.  And that includes bedtimes.  So in the summer, when the kids are tired and going to bed at 8:00 and 8:30, with the sun still streaming in their window (or busting through the edges of a blackout curtain), everyone gets a bit cranky.

To illustrate our love of darkness, this quote comes from my son on the night of the summer solstice.
"FINALLY!  The sun will start sinking again so the nights are longer."

 Maybe we were all bears in a previous life, looking forward to the months and months of hibernation. HA.

So, moving right along, we suffer, sometimes not so silently, until we notice it getting darker again.

One thing that has really helped anchor our yearly rhythm is marking the year with celebrations.  We mostly celebrate the vernal and autumnal equinox and the summer and winter solstice, with a few other nature festivals thrown in the mix as well, such as May Day and Michaelmas.  These anchor points through the year help it us to move through the months back towards the end of the year, giving us something to look forward to while we make our way back to the dark.

Why celebrate festivals at all?  Well, simply put, they are good for the soul.  The help us to connect with the rhythms of nature.  Many of the festivals celebrated in the waldorf year have been celebrated for centuries, and as preparations take place, the anticipation and excitement of the festival create a quiet sense of joy and connectedness within the family and community.


Many first time Waldorf families will try and fit in many many festivals and celebrations, giving each and every one their all. And I get it.  There are so many wonderful things to celebrate, so many beautiful verses to say, so many stunning chalk drawings to covet.  But try and do too much and many families will also soon find out what burnout feels like.

To them I say choose the festivals and celebrations that mean the most to your family.  Find the ones that really speak to you and your heart, and leave the rest.

And don't over do it.  Keep things simple. The goal is to create an event that is special in a quiet, unobtrusive way.  A wonderful yearly routine that everyone looks forward to, but doesn't exhaust you just thinking about it.

If  you start to think "Oh man,  not St John's Day AGAIN!", you are doing too much.  Each festival should be preceded with anticipation and calm, and shouldn't make you want to hide. 

If you really want to touch on all the festivals in the waldorf year, find a friend, school or community organization that celebrates the festivals and attend their celebrations.  It is nice to let someone else do the work sometimes!

Here is a list of what we celebrate through the year:

January - a small new year celebration
February - nothing
March - spring equinox
April - Easter
May - May Day
June - Summer Solstice
July - nothing
August - nothing
September - Michaelmas
October - Halloween
November - nothing (we might try Martinmas this year, as we'll be in the midst of a saints block)
December - St Nicholas / advent / Christmas (its a big month long celebration!)

As we go through the year, I will post pictures and explanation of how we celebrate so you can get a better idea of how we celebrate.

The most important thing to remember is it isn't what other families do that counts.  It is the memories and connections you make with your family that makes a festival mean something to your heart.

Cheers,
Marina

Monthly Rhythm

(This is the third installment of my rhythm series.  To see the first two posts, please visit daily rhythm and weekly rhythm. )

I cherish our monthly rhythm.  It really is the heart and soul of our family.

We actually discovered a monthly rhythm well before I ever danced with the idea of a Waldorf inspired lifestyle.  I wrote a bit about my daughter and the moon in my daily rhythm post. Once I became aware of how strong the pull of the moon is for her, we quickly fell in to a happy monthly rhythm.

Now that we are homeschooling, I have expanded that rhythm to recognize how the moon effects our learning.

The full moon is a time of great excitement and lots of outdoor time in our house.  During the day before, the day of and the day after I try and plan to be outdoors as much as possible.  This helps us all reconnect with the earth and allows us to absorb as much light as possible.  In a way it resets our internal clocks.

I find that during a full moon, we don't sleep as well.  There have been studies (you can read a report on one here ) that have proved this to be true, but I don't need a study to know that it takes the kids longer to fall asleep and that they wake up earlier each and every time the moon shines bright (even if it is cloudy).  I take this in to account when I am planning and make sure that we not only have lots of time outdoors, but quiet time indoors.

From the full moon to the new moon, we fall in to the darkness, gradually slowing down our days until we at last come to the darkness of the new moon.  On this day we often close the curtains and use candles during the day, do quiet activities like handwork and read alouds, a movie afternoon, or a walk on a trail through a thick forest.  It may sound crazy, but we all really look forward to this day!  The kids call it our cozy day and it functions as an anchor for us each month.

During the two weeks from the full moon to the new moon we focus on things we have learned, continue to work on projects we have started, discuss goals we have or things that need changing.  This is a time of review and contemplation over where we are and where we want to be, a time where we plan and reflect, preparing for the next two weeks.

The next two weeks are full of activity and new beginnings.  As we climb back in to the light, we focus on introducing new concepts, starting new projects (or new wings of old projects), learning a new skill, and put lots of energy in to our days, finally hitting the climax of the full moon. We spend increasingly more time outdoors, basking in the light of the sun and the moon. 

Once the full moon has passed and we fall back in to darkness, we take all the new skills and concepts we have spent the last two weeks focusing on and let them sit.  We rarely introduce any new concepts during this time unless they are entirely child led, but even that is a rare occurrence.  It seems the children have a natural understanding and pull towards living in the moon cycles.

And there you have it!  Our happy little moon rhythm.

Next up is the final installment of my rhythm series, seasonal rhythms and how we follow the sun on her journey around the world :)

Cheers!

Marina

Weekly Rhythm

(This is the second post in a series of posts about rhythm.  You can find the first one here )

"How do you find time to clean your house?"

That is one of the most frequent questions I get and see floating around the internet when it comes to homeschooling.

Being in the house every day, it does tend to get a tad messy.  I once had a friend say that nice thing about working all day and having the kids in school is they don't have time to make the house messy.  Good point!

So, when we are spending the day homeschooling and living in our houses, how do we find the time to clean? 

This is where Waldorf is my saving grace.  One of the first things Waldorf stresses is for wee ones to take part in many of the housekeeping chores that take place each day.

Steiner encouraged parents and teachers to let children fold socks, sweep the floor, wash dishes, etc.  All these things help children develop a sense of awareness over their body and how it works.  It provides them with purposeful movement and different sensory experiences, and it shows them that they are a valuable part of the home environment and that they have something to contribute as well. I know from my own experience that doing chores and being given that responsibility has really helped build my children's self esteem.

Also, I find when my house is scattered and messy, my brain is scattered and messy.  And if mine is scattered and messy, I can only imagine how my littles feel. 

But where do we find the time? 

To keep your clutter and dust bunnies from taking over the house, you need to fit it in to your daily rhythm, by creating a weekly rhythm.

A weekly rhythm is made up of things that don't need to be done daily, but find a place in your lives at least once a week.  For my family, a weekly rhythm is two fold:  homeschooling and homekeeping. 

Our homekeeping rhythm goes like this:

Monday - clean bedrooms, change sheets, vaccum bedrooms

Tuesday - clean dining room and living room

Wednesday - clean bathroom

Thursday - clean office

Friday - Sunday there are no specific cleaning chores to do.

Now, with all that written out, I do need to say that I do some laundry every night, because the electricity is cheaper.  And I also have daily chores that get done to help with upkeep. These include tidying in the kitchen after each meal, wiping down the bathroom before I go to bed, and because we have a dog, I vacuum the first floor each day.  These are a part of our daily rhythm.

Both the children help with chores each day. They put away clothes, they scrub the bath during their bath time, they actually fight over who gets to scrub the toilet or wash the floors (I kid you not), and they are both responsible for keeping their toys in their proper spot and helping me when things need to be organized a bit.  They have been a part of chores from the beginning and take pride in the responsibility.

But doesn't it take longer?  Don't they sometimes do things not quite right?  

Yes.  It typically takes longer.  And yes, there will be streaks on the bathroom mirror and random dust bunnies that didn't get caught, but those can be quietly and quickly fixed, and those are lessons in themselves.

Gentle reminders and cleaning tips are well received in this house because of the gentle way they are given.  For example: "Oops, one dust bunny was hiding out under the tv stand.  You know how I get those guys?  I switch to the arm instead of using the wheel.  Here, try it!" And that's that.

And because we stay on top of things on a weekly basis, it typically only takes about a half hour in the afternoon to get everything done that needs doing on that day (we only have about 1100 square feet of space total) leaving lots of time for all the other things we'd rather be doing.

In order for this to work we also have "tidy as we go" and "everything has a place (except for that pile of papers I've been shifting for the last four years)" as mottos that we TRY to live by.

And have no fear, if you were to come by any random day, you'd be greeted by a dining table full of books and crayons and a living room with swords and lego and playmobil scattered.  BUT, it will get cleaned and tidied and when we wake in the morning, we start with a fresh slate.

I'm all about the fresh slate :)

Our weekly homeschooling rhythm is totally different, and very fluid.  It is totally focused on experiences for the kids, and while we try and do these things on the specific days, it doesn't mean they aren't done on other days as well.  It is just that these are things the children picked that they really enjoyed doing and wanted to make sure there was time for them each week.

Monday is bake day

Tuesday they are at a nature program

Wednesday is art or music

Thursday is typically a walk to a library or board/card game playing

Friday we are typically on a hike.

The weekends are family time and while we still follow a pretty typical daily rhythm, we don't have anything scheduled for each weekend.

It is important to remember that you can not have a solid weekly rhythm unless your daily rhythm is solid.  I hear of so many parents struggling with rhythm because they try and do everything all at once.

Start small.

Start daily and work up to the bigger stuff.

The mess will still be there in the morning.

I promise.

Marina

Creating Rhythm

When we were first introduced to Waldorf philosophy I was drawn to its focus on nature.  The celebration of of the seasons and really getting in touch with the cycles of the earth.  

Since my daughter's birth, we have been ruled by the moon.  She has always been affected by the full moon, something I didn't notice until she was about a year old.  There were always three days of the month where she was just inconsolable and when I finally put it together, it changed the way I viewed those days.  I prepared for them. I embraced them. And to this day, I plan accordingly. 

I have an app.  Seriously.  We need this level of preparation. 

One of the lovely side effects of adopting a Waldorf inspired homeschool is that it reminds me how connected we ALL are to the earth, and how realizing this can bring a sense of calm to the home.

We found our sense of calm through creating rhythm.  Rhythm is one of those key phrases you hear thrown around when people talk about Waldorf lifestyle, one that many struggle with creating.  There are three main types of rhythm, daily, weekly and seasonal and some people, like those of us that are ruled by moon cycles, also follow a monthly rhythm.

I have found that the key to creating a daily rhythm is to create a strong core.

To find what the core of your rhythm is, just watch your family for a few days.  What are the main points of your day?  What are things that happen every day around the same time?  Make note of how every one behaves, how they feel emotionally and physically. Is After observing your family for a few days you should have a good feel of how everyone functions throughout the day, what the pivotal moments are that create the core of every day. If you don't feel you have a strong understanding of the ebb and flow of your day after a few days, just stick with it for a few more.

Remember though, you are looking for patterns only.  You are not looking for the same thing to happen at the same time each day.  You are only looking for similarities across a few days.

Once you have found the similarities, these will be your anchors. These will be the events that feed your rhythm throughout the day, provide the transition from one event to the next.

I will use my rhythm as an example.   When I followed our days, three distinct patterns appeared.  Food, dog walks and afternoons.  Our days are anchored by our meals.  they need to happen at around the same time each day or the kids start to fall apart.  Our dog also needs to be walked twice a day, morning and evening.  And afternoons in the summer equal heat, which translated in to kids that were over heated and cranky by the end of outdoor play time. 

I used these anchors to create our rhythm, using the dog walks as transition times (in the morning it transitioned us to circle time, in the evening to our evening gardening), meal times as anchor points, and the afternoon heat as something to avoid that wasn't working in our days.  We switched around some things in the morning so that we would have lots of outdoor time in the morning, and moved our main lessons to the afternoon after everyone has had their lunch.

I did this observation in the summer.  For winter, our rhythm changes slightly and I will talk about that in a different post.  Right now lets focus on daily. 

Here is what our rhythm looks like right now.

• Wake, eat, get dressed
• Walk dog
• Circle
• Outdoor time
• Lunch
• Main Lessons
• Free play time
• Handwork/art/baking (weekly activities typically go here)
• Outdoor time
• Tidy
• Dinner
• Reading
• Dog Walk
• Gardening / outdoor time
• Read aloud and snack
• Bedtime Routine

The one thing I really want to stress is there are no times associated with rhythm.  Rhythm is all about transitioning from one activity to another calmly, not because it is time to do so, but because the activity or event in complete and it is time to move on to the next.  It isn't about ushering in one activity after the other for the sake of doing things and checking them off a list, it is about mindfully choosing events in your life and letting their predictability guide your days. 

Things change, new and exciting things happen.  But the wonderful thing about a rhythm is you can pick up where you need to.  You are not a slave to the clock.  Last minute afternoon play date?  That's great!  Pick up after dinner.  Quick run to the store needed in the morning?  No worries, just pick up the next thing you want to do and go with it.  Away for a weeks vacation?  Wonderful!  Bring your rhythm, or parts of it, with you, or drop the rhythm and get back to it when the holiday is over.

Just make sure that your anchor points are strong and you can always get back to your core rhythm.  It takes commitment, yes.  It isn't something that builds itself and it does take work to find one that works and then stick to it. But the most important thing is to find what makes your family run smoothly and calmly and focus on those events that keep you smiling instead of hassled.

And most importantly, don't stress over it.  It takes some people longer than others to find their rhythm.  You will find yours.

I promise.

Cheers!

Marina